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On a day when the game she loves seemed to pass her by again, Laura Robson managed a quiet smile, reflecting on the dark days when she considered quitting tennis, but, at 23, looking forward now to rebuilding a career that was so rich in teenage promise.
It will be 10 years this summer since Robson leapt into the embrace of the nation by winning the girls’ title at Wimbledon, an exuberant London kid of Australian expatriates who would instantly embed herself in the sometimes glum British tennis narrative. It has been a rollercoaster ride ever since.
Asked on Wednesday if she ever considered walking away from tennis, she paused and replied, “The option has always been there. I haven’t ever had my parents or family members saying, ‘This is your role.’ Unfortunately, some other players maybe do. It has always been up to me whether to stop or keep going – and definitely you have some dark thoughts when you lose in China for the third week in a row. It’s always there but I don’t feel that way anymore.”
Injury, a dip in form and struggles with technique all hindered her progress when she left the juniors, although the potential flickered. She soared – never more spectacularly than at the US Open in 2012, when she became the first British player since Sam Smith in 1998 to reach the fourth round of a slam – and, after reaching those heights again the following summer at Wimbledon, fell spectacularly, a ricked wrist in Hobart threatening to wreck her career.
On day three of the 2018 Australian Open, ranked 227 in the world, Robson lost again – but after an encouraging and athletic performance alongside the American CoCo Vandeweghe in the first round of the doubles.
But she’s happy. Losing 7-6 (3), 6-4 to Chan Hao-Ching, of Taiwan, and the Slovakian veteran Katarina Srebotnik, in front of a handful of fans on court No5 was not the worst experience of her life.
“I’ve been good,” she said. “Travelling a lot. I’ve been over in Melbourne quite a lot. I was here for my sister’s wedding and from Boxing Day onwards. Using the Australian passport.
“I feel very happy on court for the first time in a long time. I’m happy to be back with Martijn [Bok, her Dutch coach]. We’re putting in some good work on the practice court. I feel very happy and super motivated.”
Robson has had life-changing experiences away from the game, as well. Last October, she and friends were leaving a country music concert at the Mandalay Bay Hotel in Las Vegas when a deranged gunman, Stephen Paddock, shot and killed 58 people, injuring another 515, before turning one of his arsenal of guns on himself. Although unscathed at the time, Robson has carried the mental scars since.
“It was a crazy, crazy thing to happen and I got really really lucky,” she said, the smile slipping briefly. “My friends got really lucky. I don’t like to think about it. We were off to the side, so you hear everything and stuff like that. But we were on the way out, anyway. So many people weren’t lucky. I got a big hug from my mum when she picked me from the airport the next day.
“It was sweet, really, because, when I got home, my dogs could sense that I was a bit off – so they just sat on me for five days. After that, you have to get back to real life and back on the court. Definitely a bit more thankful.”
She has just about parked that in the past. The future is a happier place.
“When I first came back, I felt good because I was just so happy to be back. More recently, for the last year or so, it’s tough. I haven’t had the results I wanted. I could feel myself not improving so it was … the motivation to get on the court was just not there, because it was, like, here we go again, another practice where I’m going to come off feeling terrible about myself. I had to just change my mindset from last year and put in a couple of really good weeks of training: new year, new me and all that.
“My goal for the end of the year is to be back in top 100. But really, for me, I want to feel the best possible version of myself again on court. That’s something that’s just not been there the last few years. If I win or lose, execute that to the best of my ability every time and come off feeling, like, maybe I didn’t win but I did everything that we’d been working on and, you know, vary the pace a bit more so it’s not so bash-bash tennis, I guess. .. Yeah, and just do everything I can. Then I’ll feel better about myself and better for the next week every time.”
(GUARDIAN)
